


The Way You Said "I Love You"

by Halvwyn



Series: Life of the Party Ficlets and Fics [13]
Category: Life of the Party D&D (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Confessions, Fights, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, I Love You, Idiots in Love, Last words, Letters, Love Confessions, M/M, Making Up, Married Couple, Married Life, Our boys deserve nice things, Romance, Sappy, Snapshots, Wedding Fluff, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-05
Updated: 2020-04-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:21:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23490841
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Halvwyn/pseuds/Halvwyn
Summary: The Ways you said hello:1. As a hello 2. With a hoarse voice, under the blankets 3. A scream 4. On a sunny afternoon, the late sunlight glowing in your hair 5. As a thank you 6. As an apology 7. In a letter 8. A whisper in the ear 9. Loud, so everyone can hear 10. Over and over again, till it's nothing but a senseless babble 11. As a reminder 12. When we lay together on the fresh spring grass
Relationships: Cassian/Renard (Life of the Party)
Series: Life of the Party Ficlets and Fics [13]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1681585
Kudos: 30





	The Way You Said "I Love You"

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the LOTP discord's "Soft day"!  
> This work is titled after a tumblr post of the same name, from which I took the various snapshot's names.  
> I couldn't decide on a single plot I wanted to write for Soft Day, so have a bunch of single moments instead!  
> As the title suggests, this piece examines the different ways/times the boys say I love you throughout their lives together!  
> It's angsty, it's fluffy, it's a little bit smutty, what more can a girl give?

1\. As a hello

He hadn’t heard Cassian approach. In hindsight, he should have noticed the sound of the door crack open, or the footsteps he could recognize as his husband’s without so much as a thought. But he hadn’t. Hadn’t noticed, in fact, until that familiar chuckle echoed through his study. Setting down the reports covering his desk, Vanden turned over his shoulder, a tired smile slipping onto his face.

“Come here often?” He called out softly in lieu of greeting. Cassian grinned, crossing the room with an elegant fluidity that never failed to catch Vanden off guard, make him wonder how this  _ vision _ of a man had chosen _him_.

“Only when there’s particularly handsome kings lurking about,” he purred as he reached the desk, leaning his hip against the edge. Vanden was pliant as Cassian tilted his chin up to steal a slow, familiar kiss.

“Hello, love,” he murmured as they pulled apart, lips brushing against Vanden’s own in their closeness. 

Vanden hummed as their lips brushed against each other once more, one hand coming up to rest on his husband’s hip, “Hello, Darling.”

* * *

2\. With a hoarse voice, under the blankets

Vanden was warm against his chest as they laid side-by-side in the early morning light. They’d shared a watch the night before, pressed close in the winter chill, and hadn’t moved apart as they dozed through the night. Cassian took the chance to take in the man still-asleep in his arms, his hair barely visible at the top of the blankets as he pressed into Cassian’s chest.

It was a long moment before Vanden woke, letting out a huff of warm breath against Cassian's shoulder as he did. “Good morning,  _ mio caro. _ ” he murmured, pressing a kiss to fire-red hair as he sat upright, pulling Vanden with him. He smiled softly against wind-chilled lips as Vanden pulled him in for a kiss, languid and warm before pulling back with a drowsy grin.

“I love being able to do that,” he admitted, voice hoarse from sleep as he pressed close once more, resting his head on his partner’s shoulder, “I love  _ you. _ ”

“And I, you, Vanden,” Cassian answered softly before the sounds of the party stirring served as their cue to break apart, to begin breaking down camp and continue on their adventure.

* * *

3\. A scream

The fight had been long, so long that neither he nor Cassian remembered who had started it nor what it was about. The fight had been  _ long,  _ and Vanden was  _ tired,  _ and Cassian looked ready to lash out with yet more barbs. 

“I love you!” Vanden all but screamed, the phrase feeling more like a weapon than a declaration of affection, startling the other man into quiet, “I love you, but I’m so  _ tired _ of fighting, Cassian.” His voice trailed off as tears he refused to let fall pricked at his eyes. He didn’t hear the footsteps across their room above the beating of his heart, didn’t look up when Cassian’s arms, trembling, pulled him into their embrace. “We need to do  _ something,  _ Cas, because we can’t keep doing this.” he murmured, voice threatening to crack as his eyes screwed shut.

“I know,” Cassian answered after a long moment, voice trembling much like his hands had been. A kiss was pressed to Vanden’s forehead. “We’ll do better,” he promised.

Vanden leaned into Cassian’s embrace, arms wrapping around his waist and, despite the screaming in his mind, believed him.

* * *

4\. On a sunny afternoon, the late sunlight glowing in your hair

Cassian was tired and saddle sore. They’d been riding all afternoon, Vanden desperate to get out of Shadebourne and Cassian, increasingly incapable of saying no to him, had agreed to accompany him on the ride. 

It was late in the afternoon, nearing evening, when they both slowed their horses to a walk, eventually coming to a halt in an open field. Cassian sighed happily as he dismounted, tethering his horse before moving off a little ways to lay back in the grass, eyes drifting closed.

A touch against his hand had Cassian’s eyes sliding open, smiling as he looked up at his partner. Vanden looked down at him fondly, a hint of a smile starting at his lips. The sun shone through his hair at this angle, leaving his face framed in a halo of flame-colored hair. “You are beautiful like this,” Cassian mused, turning the hand under Vanden’s to tangle their fingers together. His own smile grew at the flush that began to hint at Vanden’s cheeks at the comment.

In lieu of an answer, Vanden leaned down, ginger locks falling forward like a curtain around them as their lips brushed against each other in a gentle kiss. Cassian’s free hand came up to tangle loosely in Vanden’s hair, humming contentedly.

Vanden pulled back, after a while, lips parted and face now fully flushed. “I love you, Cassian,” he murmured, voice low despite being alone in the clearing. Cassian pulled his partner back to him, his answer lost amongst soft laughter and the press of lips.

* * *

5\. As a thank you

It was late, though Cassian had no desire to know what hour of the night, not when he knew how many more hours remained before he would finish his latest project. He set down the fabric in his hands at the sound of the bedroom door creaking open, reaching out to accept a cup of coffee as it was passed to him.

Vanden pressed a kiss to his cheek as he took the mug, breath warm against his skin even as he pulled away, “a boost to help make it through the night,” he murmured before stepping back and away, towards where his own desk sat across the room.

“Vanden?” An answering hum, followed by the sound of a chair shifting, “I love you.”

A moment of silence, followed by the huff of breath Cassian recognized as his husband’s laugh, “I love you, too, Cassian. Now get back to work, I don’t bring coffee to slackers.”

* * *

6\. As an apology

The fight had been vicious. Cassian, hurt and angry, had stormed off to their bedroom, slamming the door before crawling into bed alone. He’d been tossing and turning in the empty bed for what could have been minutes or hours since, wondering if _this_ would be the fight that broke them apart.

He stilled as the door creaked open, his back to Vanden’s side of the bed. He held his breath as footsteps padded softly across the wooden floors, closed his eyes as Vanden's weight silently shifted the mattress.

The breath he was holding slipped past his lips as Vanden’s arm came to curl around his waist, his back pressed to Vanden’s chest. His body seemed to melt at the gentle kiss pressed to his shoulder, another closer to his spine. “I love you,” echoed across the quiet of the room, “I’m sorry I yelled.”

Cassian didn’t answer, instead tangling his hand with Vanden’s, squeezing gently until his partner relaxed against his back. There would be more words, softer ones, in the morning. But for now, the pair let silence drift over them, let it draw them into sleep.

* * *

7\. In a letter

My Cassian,

It’s been far too long since I’ve been able to be by your side, and I pray that this letter finds you safe and sound despite the dangers in both of our lives. I find a day has yet to pass that I have not thought about you. You are distracting even in your absence, it seems.

I hope to return to Mirrortail in the coming weeks. If things go well, I’ll be back beside you shortly after this letter arrives in your hands. I’m counting the moments until that day comes.

I love you, darling, and I hope that even when I’m away, that that fact remains clear.

Yours until my dying day,

Vanden

* * *

8\. A whisper in the ear

Music echoed throughout the ballroom, voices a hum around the edges of the dance floor. Vanden’s attention, however, was drawn entirely to his dancing partner. His eyes met Cassian’s, golden eyes gleaming in the candlelight as they made their way around the dance floor.

“I love you,” his fia-no, husband now, murmured in his ear as they danced, “in case you hadn’t realised it yet.”

Vanden’s laugh was quiet, just for the two of them as their first dance began to slow to a stop, other couples beginning to join them on the floor after a smattering of applause. “I don’t think I had,” he answered as the pair began moving to the next piece, steps in sync as Cassian led them through the dance, “I may need you to say it again.”

He could feel Cassian’s lips brush against his ear as he pulled Vanden close, “ _ Ti amo, mio caro. _ ” Their feet stopped moving, other couples continuing to swirl around them as Vanden pulled his husband in for a kiss, followed by another. 

They’d fought hard for this moment, through battlefields and their own stubbornness. Capturing Cassian’s lips in a third kiss, Vanden decided the fighting had been worth every second.

* * *

9\. Loud, so everyone can hear

Elyse groaned in frustration over the tankard of ale in her hands, leaning back to look at where Vanden and Cassian sat side-by-side across from her, arguing heatedly over their plans for the following day’s supply run. “When are you two going to stop the fighting and admit that you’re meant for each other?”

The pair turned to face the sorcerer with surprised blinks, the rest of the party looking on in amusement. “You two would make a lovely pair,” Astra chimed in, eyes darting between his two friends with a smile.

To Cassian’s surprise, it was Vanden who spoke up, hand reaching over to brush a thumb over the back of a henna-covered hand, “Do you know what they’re on about, darling?” he asked, voice loud enough to carry over the voices and music filling the tavern.

The elf grinned as he leaned over, capturing Vanden’s lips in a kiss before leaning back into his seat with a practiced grace, “I haven’t the slightest idea, _Amore_. We’ve been together for weeks.”

The looks of pleased surprise on their friends' faces was only sweetened by the flush of his boyfriend’s cheeks, clashing with the orange-red of his hair.

* * *

10\. Over and over again, till it’s nothing but a senseless babble

Vanden gasped, back arching as Cassian pressed butterfly kisses down his chest. “Cassian...Cass....my love, please.” he gasped out, trying to move under the firm grasp of the elf’s hands on his hips.

“Patience,  _ tesoro, _ I want to savor you tonight,” he all but purred, thumbs rubbing soothing circles into Vanden’s skin even as his lips continue to tease, to work him up further.

“Love,  _ please _ ,” hands twisted in the sheets by Vanden’s head, flush spreading down his chest as his husband continued to slide lower, closer to where Vanden wanted, no, needed him to be.

It wasn’t long until stammering pleas and breathless “I love you"’s were the only words left on his lips at all, until desperate  _ “Cassian” _ ’s were joined with nails down backs and teeth in shoulders.

As they fell into each other, it was only those words that mattered: gasped out names, keening pleases, and all but sacred I love you’s.

* * *

11\. As a reminder

They had planned the raid for weeks, but it had done little to ease the tight ball of anxiety that sat in the party’s chests when the day came. 

Just as if it was any other day, Vanden walked beside him, rapier on his hip and hair pulled back and out of his face. His hand was warm in Cassian’s, occasionally tightening its grip on his fingers as if to reassure himself that the elf was, in fact, there at his side. Catching Vanden’s eyes with his own, he lifted their hands to press a kiss to his partner’s knuckles. “We will be fine,  _ Amore,  _ just as always.”

Vanden’s smile didn’t reach his eyes as he nodded, leaning over to press a kiss to raven-black hair. They were quiet for a long moment, until their destination loomed in the distance. “Cassian, just in case this goes wrong-” he started, voice tight.

“Don’t even  _ think _ about it, Vanden.” Cassian cut in. Because he wasn’t stupid, he knew full well that even the most well-planned of battles can do wrong, the party having barely escaped more times than he would like to count. He needed no reminders of what they were quite literally walking into.

“Cassian, please.” Vanden all but begged, tugging the man around to face him, the rest of the group moving on ahead and Sariel offering a nod of acknowledgement as they passed. "I want you to remember how much I love you.” 

“How could I ever forget, with you reminding me of it daily?” Cassian murmured, a wry smile on his lips as he squeezed Vanden’s hand, pressed a soothing kiss to his lips. 

It would occur to him later, that as far as final words could go, affirming their shared love was far from the worst of possibilities.

* * *

12\. When we lay together on the fresh spring grass

For the first time in a long time, Vanden felt truly content. Astra’s voice and lute echoed softly in the glen they had chosen to rest in from where the tiefling sat against a tree behind him. Even with his eyes closed, he could hear Boblem and Elyse chattering further off, Sariel watching in quiet amusement.

Without thinking, he reached his hand out to brush against where he knew Cassian’s rested next to him, fingers bumping until their hands were locked together, side-by-side in the fresh spring grass. Opening his eyes, Vanden turned his head to see Cassian sitting beside him, one hand holding firmly to his own, thumb rubbing idle circles into the back of his hand, as the other trailed over words of the book sitting in his lap.

He could spend the whole afternoon like this, he realised; the sounds of his friends happy and safe with the man in front of him at his side. He didn’t think before he spoke, the words coming out before he could think better of them.

“I think I love you,” he murmured, Cassian’s eyes jumping to meet his own as the elf startled.

“Pardon?” 

“I love you, Cassian,” Vanden found himself saying again, fingers loosening slightly in case the elf withdrew his hand. Instead, a smile slipped onto his face, the private one reserved for him, as Cassian lifted their joined hands to his lips, pressing a kiss to freckled knuckles before speaking.

“I love you, too,  _ mio caro. _ ”


End file.
